Hasbro Goes Euro with Hex-Based U-Build: Monopoly

I opened up my coupon fliers this morning to see that Monopoly has decided to rip off take a page from the Settlers of Catan folks, and has issued a line of games that involves building your own game board using hex tiles. Could this mean that Euro games are finally starting to make a dent in Hasbro? Well we can see that games like Settlers have at least caught Hasbro's attention.

Here's what it looks like (and yes, I will likely be using my $4 off coupon from this week's Sunday circular to pick up a copy of my own): The Monopoly properties, which have been renamed for this "U-Build" version, are now positioned on plastic-framed hexes that connect to form a board path. The game also comes with plastic 3-D stadiums, parks, and skyscrapers that can be built on the hexes. Word is that otherwise the game is very similar to the original.

It's not just Monopoly that got a U-Build makeover though, there's also a U-Build: Connect 4, U-Build: Battleship, and U-Build: Mousetrap. These opt for slightly different variations. U-Build: Connect Four, for example, uses children's building construction set bits to create a pinball-like course for the checkers to drop down through. Think of it as if Connect Four and Erector Set got together and decided to play Plinko from The Price is Right. Mousetrap and Battleship are a bit less exciting. Mousetrap actually has bricks (read: Legos) to customize board obstacles, but Battleship just lets you slightly customize your boats with "U-Build bricks" (again, Legos).


My Impressions:

I'll admit that normally I'm very pessimistic about any Hasbro games, since I think that they cater to the lowest common denominator of the stupidest people on the planet. Sure, I love Clue and even a bit of Monopoly now and then, but that's mainly because they were created and developed back when board games were still for adults (Parker Brothers knew what it was doing). Since Hasbro has come along and kiddy-fied their entire board game market (just look at their modern silly childlike logo), it's hard to respect any of their games. They've moved to the cheapest possible components, and have dumbed down even the classics (did Monopoly really need an electronic banking version? If you can't add $200 + $500, then you don't get to play Monopoly!)

And it looks like their giant idiot stick has smacked these games once again. Although I applaud delving into the Euro waters with some hex play, the giant plastic frames around the hexes with attachment tabs and slots make it look like its Duplo Monopoly for toddlers 2-3 years old.

At least U-Build: Monopoly has reasonable cover art going on though. Take a look at some of the cover art for the other U-Build titles. Yikes. Bad paintings of kids having waaaay too much fun playing games. It's cheesy, cheap, and a little demeaning. I've never understood the marketing principle that board games need to show people enjoying them. To me, it's like a laugh track on a sitcom. Give us some decent cover art and let us decide if it's fun and worth raising our arms in the air!

Poor U-Build: Battleship looks like it got the worst makeover of all. I haven't kept current on Battleship editions, but this incarnation looks the cheapest and like it's trying the hardest to ruin the game. Do people really need a cardboard pretend command center? I hate that they've moved the attack board to a separate side board.

And, by the way, I think it's quite unfortunate that this line of games chose to go with the text message-friendly "U-Build" name. It's just another sign that their games shouldn't be taken seriously. It's too bad the average American has no idea what a hexagon is, or they could've called it Hex Monopoly and made me happy.

With all that said though, I will post pictures once my Build-Your-Own Monopoly set is up and running in all its hex glory.